"Murph, would you like a ham sandwich?"
Stories of the unexpected in Business Leadership
The Zen proverb, “When I sit up straight in the chair, I feel like a Sovereign,” suggests that action precedes transformation: by doing the thing (sitting up straight), the sense of dignity and benefit follows. This truth applies not only to individual habits but resonates in our interactions with others.
David is a master of attentiveness and engagement. He is “an HR Leader with a strong strategic and operational focus,” and regularly offers the reminder: “Help someone today even in a very, very small way. Remember when others helped you. Kindness goes a long way.”
David’s advice highlights how leadership can be practiced. He himself is a renown and highly respected practitioner of kindness. As David emphasizes small gestures, I am reminded of a remarkable meeting with author John (Jack) Shea.
I needed some advice, and Jack invited me over. Jack welcomed me into his Lincoln Park home with an unexpected offer: “You want a ham sandwich?” The simplicity of his hospitality, delivering a Diet Coke, pickles, chips, and mustard made a lasting impression.
To this day, I do not recall the specifics of his career counsel, but I vividly remember the warmth of his welcome. Jack’s wisdom in that moment was not just in what he said, but in how he made me feel. He is a sound practitioner of hospitality. Jack was being Jack, but I remain astonished. His grace and presence embodied authentic human connection.
That lesson resurfaced recently while walking with CEO Alex, who was sharing his business concerns. Our conversation paused abruptly when Alex spotted an older woman struggling with a file box. Without hesitation, he shouted, “Do you want me to get the box or the doors?”
He ran to her aid and held both doors for her, ensuring her passage before returning and resuming our discussion seamlessly. Alex’s spontaneous act exemplified his style of leadership through attentive consideration; the sort that requires no audience and expects no reward. In everything he does, Alex is a careful practitioner of outward consideration.
Each of these stories, from David’s daily encouragement to Jack’s everyday hospitality to Alex’s quick responsiveness, demonstrates how civility and recognition can elevate ordinary moments into something meaningful. Meaningful acts build reputation. They impact.
Sound leaders understand that genuine engagement is not about transactional “people-pleasing,” but about seeing and uplifting others in small, tangible ways. Perhaps unintentionally they uplift their depth of character along the way.
The character of a leader reveals itself in everyday moments of respect and generosity; those quiet acts that lift others with no expectation of recognition. Perhaps it is within these small, thoughtful gestures, a sandwich shared, or a door held open, that the genuine character of a leader truly emerges.
Kevin C. Murphy, Psy.D.